From Nathaniel:
I just recently fell out of love with someone. This person was someone who came into my life and immediately captured my heart. She was so wild and so unlike myself in so many ways that I was immediately in love. So this went on for a while on and off, until I went home to Florida. While I was gone for only a few days she cheated on me, and in the next few days, with the help of her roommate especially, what we had totally fell apart. I was utterly devastated as I had unknowingly invested quite a lot into her, and having all that gone at once was very hard to deal with. Then all my friends started telling me how bad she was for me, which I understand and ultimately know is true. Then about a week and a half ago she called me, apologizing for everything, and saying that she still loved me. Then three days later she talks on her Facebook all about her new crush, so I immediately deleted her from my friends list. I understand that she wasn’t good for me, and that she in so many ways put me in a very bad position, however everyday my idle thoughts turn to thinking about her. I know even if we did get together again, at this point it wouldn’t be right, but I know that I still have a longing to be with her. I want to find a way to be rid of these feelings, or at least find a way for me to move on, and develop new love once again. Do you have any suggestions?
Inspirations from Binah:
A love shared by two people is something that can never be fully expunged, nor should it be. There were some wonderful moments that when brought to mind will always fill you with the loving emotions of the experiences shared. What you seek is not to forget her all together, but to reach a point where she is memory that lives in the past. We underestimate the value and happiness of reminiscing. The past is something we should treasure and learn from without trying to recreate it in the present.
With that goal in mind, are your thoughts of her rooted in an emotional cord that must be cut or a clean, yet still open, wound that is slowly healing? From your words, you recognize that this is not the relationship for you and have accepted that you and she must go your separate ways. You are walking the path of the Death card, so it is appropriate that to honor this parting you hold a formal ceremony.
If you feel that there is something that is pulling you back to her, cut the emotional cords using any of the methods shared in previous Inspirations from Binah answers titled:
With the cords cut, call upon the energy of the Phoenix and the purification power of its flaming death to release the last of your longing and cauterize the wound.
Phoenix Rebirth Ceremony
In a flame-proof location, create a small nest made out of twigs or small branches. In the center, place some myrrh resin or incense. Place over the myrrh something that reminds you of her; this can be an object, picture or even a piece of paper with her name on it.
Set your sacred space and call in your Higher Self and guardians. Invoke the Phoenix and prepare for the transmutation through death. When you are ready, set the nest and all the objects within it, on fire . As the Phoenix burns, channel all your longing into the flame and ask for Archangel Rafael, the divine physician, to provide healing energy to soothe your heartache.
Allow the fire to completely burn out. If possible, leave the ashes where they are, allowing the energy to regenerate and complete the healing process. If they must be moved, put them in a box or someplace where thy will not be disturbed. In three days, take the ashes and scatter them into nature, symbolizing the rebirth of the Phoenix. Healthy and happy, the Phoenix circles the sky ready to begin again, just as you are now ready to continue your journey with an open heart.
Though it will take time for your lingering thoughts to find a new place to rest, when you feel especially vulnerable, call upon the Phoenix and allow it to burn away your longing and inspire your next steps.
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