I have a great negative power inside me that I need to release
May 25, 2009
From Oxgene:
The reason I seek your help coz lately I have been throw a very, very tough experience and its effecting me very badly. I even suffer from post traumatic stress disorder its very hard to explain, YOU know when sometimes you feel that you are going to blast any time soon it happens to me all the time & I can notice it visually. I mean each time I remember what happened to me my veins gets enlarged and I can feel the blood flood, there is too much pain & agony inside of me, I want to get rid of it and I cant my soul are burning and the more I try to carry on and forget every thing happened the more harder it gets. I just want the f@$k out of all of this, its killing me slowly and I cant shut my mind of it. I went to the doctor and he told me you have a great negative power inside of you and your brain, so my question is do you have any practice that can help me lose this great power? I tried so many things but it seems its not working out properly, I became very aggressive and non patient person always on the edge even with the closet people to my heart some times I feel my brain and my skull is dividing in two halves, seriously I don’t know what to do?
From Inspirations from Binah:
I admire your courage. Even with this negativity pulling at you from the inside you continue to seek help. The human mind carries much information and each piece has a reason. The smallest detail that we often think is just useless knowledge carries a key to some unknown lock which will one day present itself.
Your negativity is the lock, the question is, where is the key? To find it, you are going to have to go deep into the abyss of Da’at, the well of your hidden knowledge. The exploration will be hard, but once you obtain the key you can open the lock and allow the pain and negativity to float freely out of your mind.
I encourage you to find a healer to work directly with you to find the source of your pain. There are many different techniques, including conventional therapy, holistic practitioners and energy work. Seek out the one that speaks to you. You may even find that it will take a combination of them to figure out the mystery. The most important part is to not give up. Though it feels like you are closing yourself off to others, reaching out here and to your doctor proves that you are not. Open your heart and allow others to help you through your process. Yes, you will get angry and aggressive at times, but those that love you will understand that this is a necessary step in order for you to find true freedom from this negativity.
When you are ready, cut the final cords that cling to you and pull you into the abyss. The practitioner to do this will present herself when the time is right, accept her and allow all that holds you back to finally be released and transmuted. In the end, the amazing person that you are will once again emerge, ready to accept the world with open arms. Blessings to you on your process.
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